I've been thinking

I have been thinking a lot the past couple of days. I've been thinking about why we are here on this earth and about what my part in it should be. This recent tragedy in our family has really helped me to gain a new perspective on life. Things that seemed so important and urgent last week, just don't seem even remotely important anymore. Minor squabbles going on in the neighborhood, worrying about what needs to get checked off my "to do" list, or what I need to put on the calendar. They just don't seem to matter any more.

The only things that matter to me right now are my family and the gospel. I keep thinking that I have been squandering my time away here on this earth when I could and should be doing things of eternal importance. I can see that spending time with my children; nurturing them and loving them, is one of the most important things I can do. Attending the temple and doing family history work for those who cannot do it for themselves is equally as important. Making myself better and sharing the gospel with others are all right up there too. The rest of the fluff of life just doesn't really matter.

And I marvel at the fact that the rest of the world just keeps moving forward. The inauguration, world politics, local headlines. They all just keep coming. I find myself thinking, "Don't they know something big has happened? Don't they realize that someone very important to us will never share time with us on this earth again?" Because our family's world has stopped, I think that everyone else's life should stop too. I guess I feel that they need to stop and acknowledge that something big and life-changing has happened to us before we can move forward too.

But then I realize that my life is not under a microscope. What happens to me doesn't happen to everyone. But sharing some of my grief with others and having them acknowledge that this is a hard thing...well, that has helped me to find some peace and to start to heal. I know it will take a long time for that hole in all of our hearts to heal, but feeling the love and support and the caring of those around us really helps. So thank you for being a part of that. We've received many calls, e-mails, and other offerings love and support. Thank you for caring. It really means a lot.